Saturday, December 25, 2010

How to Be a Good Friend


Do you have someone that you thing is important to yourself? Being a good guy/girl to be around, you'll get more friends than you could ever imagine. So after I read and gathered information from others web I have compared this and let read it guy.

FIRSTLY, WE NEED TO IMPROVE OURSELF. BE A NICE GUY WILL GIVE POSITIVE THINKING AND RESPECT FROM OTHER PEOPLE.

Steps How to Be a Good Friend


A dishonest person has no chance of having true friends. Don't over spoil your friend, especially if she's never (or hardly) done anything for you. It shows you are desperate and you will definitely regret it later.
If you miss an event like their party, apologize to them and offer to make it up to them. To some people, a birthday party is something that can hurt them if you don't come.
Don't expect, demand or abuse generosity or "wear out your welcome." When your friend does something nice for you, then reciprocate quickly. Money isn't, or doesn't have to be, an issue.
  • Don't Compare Labels, Prices, Size And Value.
  • Don't Let Your Friend Pay Every Time You Go Out, Even If It's Offered. Don't Help Yourself To Things At Your Friend's House Without Asking, Unless You Are Willing And That Is Desired -- And Practiced At Your House In Turn.
  • If You Borrow Something From A Friend, Take Good Care Of It And Then Return It Without Being Asked.
As before, if you have a selfless friend, that always expects something back; try to accommodate. That's if one doesn't make it too obvious, like begging or envying. This does not mean giving large or expensive presents. This can just mean being there when you are needed. If you already gave a lot of your time, then that gift is probably in appreciation for that... and so, don't feel obligated to make an equal gift in that kind of case. Just say thanks, "That's nice." No gift would be expected that way.
Don't be selfish. Grabbing, stealing, envying and/or begging are big No's in the rules of friendship. The friend will soon get tired of this and eventually move towards more self-less people who are willing to give the same as one gets, but a good friend will not demand it, yet one might mention being tired of it. Even if you are a total wreck -- don't expect constant sympathy.
Listen but  you don't have to agree -- just listen to what is said. Make sure to stop talking to listen -- so you are not just running your mouth. Some people don't really find it interesting listening to someone talk about your/their feelings 24/7. If you're monopolizing every conversation with your feelings, the friend isn't getting anything out of the relationship (Don't sigh and groan like the world is against you. Seek help elsewhere and try to stop being paranoid.). Invite sharing hearts with you as often as you would share your heart -- but not so you have a monopoly on the friends time or have some juicy gossip or a cut down like to do to "teach a lesson" to your friend. A long or hard lesson may not be practical or appreciated at all.
Never make a promise you know you can't keep. Good friendship is based on trust - if you break a friend's trust, the friendship may be very hard to salvage. Of course, if you have made a promise and planned to keep it, but circumstances beyond your control conspire to prevent it, let your friend know as soon as you find out. Don't wait until 15 minutes after you were supposed to arrive to call and say, "gee, I'm sorry." Instead, a quick call to say, "Hey, I know I promised to help you with whatever it is, but my mom is telling me we are going to my aunt's for the weekend, and leaving tomorrow just after school - that means I won't be able to make it. I'm so sorry. Can we reschedule?" That's just honoring the fact that your friend is counting on you, and respecting the fact that, given a little notice, your friend might just be able to get someone else to help with whatever it was - or not, whatever. But at least you won't be hanging your friend out to twist in the wind.
Give your friend space. Understand if he/she wants to be alone or hang out with other people. Allow it to happen. There's no need to become clingy or needy. Friendship doesn't require that you always have to be paired together. Allowing one another the time to hang with other friends gives you much-needed breathing room, and allows you to come together fresh and appreciating each other even more.
Give advice, add perspective. Don't judge your friend, but do advise to stay out of dangerous situations where one may harm oneself or others. Tell him/her how you perceive his/her situation, and what you might do in the same circumstances. Don't be offended by one listening to your advice and then deciding to ignore it. Your friend must make his or her own decisions. Avoid saying "You should...". That may feel like you are imposing "shoulds" upon your friend.
Be respectful. Things you and your friend discuss should be treated with care - your friend is not sharing this information with just anyone, and may not want to. She shared it with you - and only you, as far as you know. Example: If your friend doesn't want to name her crush, don't push her into it. If she has named her crush, don't tell anyone else. This is just common courtesy anyone and everyone deserves the expectation that you will keep confidences. Be loyal. If your friend tells you something in confidence, don't talk about it to anyone else. Don't discuss your friend behind his/her back except when it involves the other person, and you won't just make it worse. Nobody likes a gossip or backstabber. Never say anything about your friend that you would not really want to repeat face to face.
Be real. Are you trying to be friends with someone to be accepted into a certain clique, or because you'd like to get to know someone else that he or she knows? That's not friendship, it's opportunism. Every new person you meet has the right to be accepted (or not) on his or her own merits, it's better to just be yourself than let anyone else influence you into being someone you are not. And you should fill their brain with good things. Remember, it's better to be hated for who you are, than to be liked for who you aren't.

SECONDLY, TO BOOSTS OURSELVES WE NEED A QUALITY. BASICALLY, WE NEED TO REDUCE THE QUALITY THAT WE NEED.TRY TO REDUCE IT TO BE A GOOD QUALITIES. NOT A LOT OF QUANTITY BUT POOR QUALITIES. THING ABOUT IT WITH YOURSELF WHAT ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT QUALITIES THAT YOU NEED?

Qualities of Good Friends

Haven’t we heard the famous saying a friend in need is a friend indeed? But Friendship has much more to it. Friendship is an integral part of human existence. Though true friendships can start instantly it takes time to build and develop. If you are wondering why you don't seem to have any good friends, you should probably have a look at the below given qualities. Good friends often come with a multitude of qualities. Given are 12 Characteristics of a Good Friend.

1. Accepts you as you are: A good friend is someone who does not try to be somebody that he is not and accepts you as you are. They are also patient With You When You Make Mistakes And Forgive You When You Hurt Them.
2. Dependable: A Good
friend is dependable and you can trust your friend with your secrets and know that he would not let a third person know about it. He sticks with you in good times and bad. When you ask for advice, a good friend points out the right direction.
3. Honest: A good friend would be honest and loyal with you. He does not break the promises that he made to you. He makes you feel safe and secure with him. He is your true critic. You will find many who falsely appreciate you and your work to remain in good books. A good friend will tell you the truth even if it's something you don't want to hear. He will point out your mistakes in private and not in front of others and also help overcome it.
4. Listen to you: A good friend always listens to you and cares about your needs and emotions. A good friend would be there always when
You Need To Talk. When You Have News To Share Or Grievances He Gives You Full Attention.
5. Be There For You: A Good Friend Would Be There With You Through Thick And Thin. Good Friends Don’t Call Up People Only To Request a favor. But he would be the first person to come to your aid in time of crisis. He also does not allow you to indulge in any addiction or illicit activities.
6. Give you Space: A good friend respects your privacy. He understands that you have family, other friends and colleagues who are part of your life t
OO AND DO NOT CLING TO YOU ALWAYS. HE BUILDS TRUST AND CONFIDENCE WHICH MAKES YOU COMFORTABLE ENOUGH TO SHARE YOUR GOOD AND BAD TIMES WITH HIM.
7. ALWAYS IN TOUCH: GOOD FRIENDS DON’T WAIT FOR YOU TO CALL YOU. HE ALWAYS MAKES AN EFFORT TO KEEP IN TOUCH WITH YOU EVEN IF IT IS THROUGH A QUICK PHONE CALL OR AN EMAIL. HE KNOWS WHAT'S GOING ON in your life and is interested about it. A good friend also does not avoid even if they are busy and do not ignore your phone call or mails. A good friend makes it clear that they care about you.
8. Do not bad mouth you: A good friend does not bad mouth you or talk behind your back. A good friend is a friend you can trust and won't gossip about you or try to damage your reputation. They will let you know when they're concerned and do their best to stick up for you when you're in trouble. A good friend will also apologizes when he does something wrong. He does not keep grudges.
9. Happy for you: A good friend never gets jealous on your success but would be happy for you. He celebrates your success and his success with you. When you are down and needs support he would be there to support and care about you. An ideal friend has a sensitive side which would make them understand others feelings. They may not be able to read your mind, but chances are they can usually tell when you're happy, sad, excited, shocked or upset. A good friend will likely know how to lift your spirits and make your day.
10. Supportive: A good friend is supportive of you and your goals. He will know what makes
you tick and help you become the person you want to be. They won't try to change who you are or drag you into situations that make you uncomfortable. When you are in a situation where you need to be defended he would be right there beside you.
11. Common Interests: A good friend is someone with whom you have something in common. He is fun to be with and he understands you and respects you.
12. Giving: Good friends give more than what is asked. When they see a need they respond before the other has a chance to ask without expecting anything in return and without anyone knowing about it. Good friends are generous with their time, money, possessions and knowledge. Best of all they have a generous spirit.
There is a saying that what you give is what you get back. The qualities you want in a friend should be the same that you are offering to someone else. How else can you expect to have good friends if you aren’t one yourself? 
LASTLY, TO BE A GOOD FRIEND IS NOT IN THE BOOK OR ANY WEB THAT YOU CAN SEARCH. BUT, TO BE A GOOD FRIEND IS BORN FROM YOUR HEART. JUST ASK YOUR SINCERE HEART WHAT IS YOU NEEDED IN THIS RELATIONSHIP?

6 Ways to Be a Good Friend
  1. Spend quality time together. If you can’t go for walks or to yoga class together, then telephone or email your friend regularly. The conversations needn’t be long or personal; those quick “I’m thinking of you” moments can go a long way in making a strong support network.
  2. Make friends a priority. Maybe you “should” clean the house, wash the dog, go grocery shopping, or watch tv (some people feel they should do that!). But give those “shoulds” the brush and prioritize your friendships. There will be plenty of time for those “shoulds” when you’re dead. For now, think about the health benefits of friendship.
  3. Be there for the good and bad. Show up for the funerals and the weddings, the surgeries and the celebrations! Be sincerely sad or genuinely happy for your friend – and include them on the good and bad in your life, too. One way to be a good friend is to be inclusive.
  4. Don’t keep score. Who called who last? Who bought lunch last? Who spent the most on Christmas gifts? Who forgot whose birthday? Who cares? If you have a good friend, cut a little slack. If your friendship really isn’t that great, then maybe you need to re-evaluate it. The health benefits of friendship will outlast the score-keeping cards.
  5. Notice the little things. The conversations that matter the most are the quick little ones that last only a few minutes. It’s not always the deep long heart-to-hearts that bond friends together -- it's the day to day minutiae of everyday life. One way to be a good friend is to have short, sweet conversations.
  6. Focus on the positive. We all have quirks and weaknesses; focusing on your friend’s strengths and wonderful qualities will keep your friendship alive and strong. To be a good friend, forget about the things you wish were different.


QUIZ: Are you a good friend?
A: no
B: idiot friend
C: useless friend
D: not sure..